A Thought But Out Loud

  Isn’t it crazy when you think of all the things that adulting throws at you???  The world we live in has changed so much over the last 10 years and I am so glad to see I am changing with it. One thing you don’t want to do is stop changing. Not changing and growing alone can cause an environment that will be toxic to your mind and soul, and it will spread a negative example.  I compiled a short list of things we can do to help find peace in a storm. One of the best ways that we can find peace is by meditating and starting our day with a mentality of being able to give and receive. Giving knowledge and receiving knowledge.  And trust me I get it when no one wants to hear everything will be okay or how do you even focus on peace when everything is so chaotic. I can’t lie that is hard. But learning to navigate hard is where you will actually find your peace. It’s such a weird perspective but if you think that when everything is easy that’s when you will find peace th...

I say this topic to say when we take time to try our best to get to know someone.  Isn’t  it the worst when they start doing things that let us know we don't know them. I had an old post a few months ago about Secret Single Behavior, this ties into that post and is an in-depth part 2. So, in the beginning you meet, and you love their smile. You love the intelligent conversations, and what about all the things that you have in common that just makes your connection get deeper. But of course what about the things that people never say out loud.  No one you meet says hey how you doing I am extremely insecure about x y z .  No guy who just wants to fuck is going to say hey how are you doing my name is Curtis I just want to have amazing sex with you.  Or better yet it’s great to meet you but I have an unusually weird porn addiction.  That’s right weird shit starts coming out later. Maybe they prefer to sleep alone, or...

 Yikes 😳 crazy topic but I can’t say it’s not necessary. Sometimes we want to be supportive to the people in our lives.  Maybe your married and they say its till death do you part and in sickness and in health, basically I'm there for you.  Also, with your friends there are a lot of one-sided relationships where support only is coming from the one friend all the time.  Is it the bond and love that keep people being supportive even when it becomes a crutch for the next person or a nightmare for the person that's being supportive.    It's funny how a person can actually see that being supportive for a friend or loved one is no longer serving you or them but yet they continue doing it.  Why do we do this?  Is it out of obligation.  The promise to stay committed and the thoughts of what would people say if I wasn't there for my best friend or partner.  Are we doing it for an audience and validation or are ...

 So you know what sparked this life post!!! People!!! Literally people! People we call friends. People we call family. People we call lovers.  I have yet to wrap my mind around territorial and jealous humans. People who say you can’t sit with us only because they want you all to themselves.  People who need to be the center of every conservation or better yet “why is the topic not ME. These people who see or hear you talking to someone else, and they lose their minds with jealousy. People who you don’t do anything to them, but they want to dismiss you and make you feel alienated.  People who just think that you don’t belong.  People who show up for the event to secretly wish it doesn’t do well. Ahhhh they say you will entertain angels unaware, but the reverse can be true my friends you literally entertain the demons too. Y’all be safe!!! I was just thinking 💭 out loud. 

 This is literally the lifeline to any and all relationships. You cannot have a growing successful relationship with anyone if it’s piss poor communication.  Sometimes you may not want to communicate with people in fear of them not reacting the way you want. Especially when you don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings, but truth be told this will only and always make things worse. Being hurt and knowing the truth is 10 times better than someone being in the dark about how you feel or just knowing what’s going on.  Lack of communication can ruin trust and it can ruin how you authentically deal with that person. Don’t assume that everything is okay when you flaked on somebody a few times. Let them know why you couldn’t make it be clear about what’s keeping you from making your planned meeting.  Often times the best couples can be ruined because of lack of and poor communication.  These terms are so different LACK of Communication is just neve...

 I say it all the time and it’s honestly so true we are so into this person and then all of a sudden, we just don’t feel like it fits anymore. It's interesting how the chemistry is going great everything seems very seamless with the connection but then it's the reality of things that begin to hold you back.   Maybe you want different things or maybe it’s just the idea of that person sounded goo d.  You know what I mean. We like the way the energy flows, we have conversations with depth but by the fourth date or when you start to think of the relationship evolving. Oh, wait now we have to unveil secret single behavior, or we are trying to fit you in to an  already routine weekly schedule. Uummmm I literally liked the idea of having company or the idea of going out to eat or the idea of kissing somebody’s ear or the idea of ANYTHING you enjoy doing with someone.  But now it has become an attachment that the other p...

Secret Single Behavior lol!!! We all have it and if it's a secret behavior do, we really even want the people we love and spend time with to know about it.  Well, I know that I have my own secret single behavior, are you kidding me we all have it.  So, the biggest question is do we change it, or do we just trust the people we love with our weirdo behavior!!  Okay ya'll I know it doesn't   necessarily mean we are weird because it's a secret.  Maybe you just think they may judge you for it.  What if it's just something you know they don't agree with.  The thought of changing who you are because of it totally means you should maybe rethink your choice on who you are with.  We should feel comfortable with our mates but how long does it take to let your guard down.  How long before you truly can trust them with your secret single behavior?  I actually came up with this logic from an episode of Sex ...