A Thought But Out Loud

  In the recent movie Blink Twice Channing Tatum's character Slater King said 'forgetting is a gift".  This made me think a lot about all of the times men in my life and even to this day are s till playing this same card.  It is a crazy perspective to have yet has this not been the male perspective for so long.  Freaking Centuries! I'm talkin ANCIENT CIVILIZATIONS Long!!  My first example of this is when men cheat on their significant others how they are asked to forgive and forget!!! To be honest some women would rather forget and just sweep it under the rug and act like it doesn't happen to keep the peace, keep the money, or keep the status, or the one that really annoys me the most to appear and seem easy or cool.  Fuck that! This type of behavior is a big way for men to lose respect for women in general.  A lot of times we are so surprised at the way men treat us but sometimes when men have been given passes so much or allowed to disrespect women for so long it

  Don’t you just love a good steamy title that just makes you wonder wtf is this girl about to say !!! Ha !!  Well , I got some thoughts on this one ☝🏽  I have been married and I have been in long term relationships. I have been in the dumbest situationships, and so of course there’s those one night stands that we can’t seem to get around unless you are an extreme religious type.  But one thing is for sure that when the sex is just not it do you work on it ?? Well that’s a great topic for the next blog so comment for part two and I will definitely do that .  However , right now what about when the sex is so good but the person is so annoying. You know there are many scenarios to this some examples would be , Great sex horrible conversations… Great sex none of the same interests … Great sex he’s just not your type physically .. Great sex you are not financially compatible ( and we know men don’t care about this but women do ) …Great sex but he’s just not that into you… great sex but he

  And the world keeps turning...  I am h ere today to speak on conditioning the one thing that makes us who we are. Do you ever wonder why you do the things you do or think the things you think or say the things you say? Studies say we remain recognizably the same person throughout our lives, from early childhood to later in life. Also, I have heard many successful people say you are the same as the five people you hang around most.  So, with that being said how do you let go of the conditioning that is happening to you everyday. Self awareness may be one solution.  Also, I think the first step is knowing your control on any given situation.  Hopefully depending on your situation, you can control who you hang around. I know in some people's life they cannot control who they hang around.  For example, and this is just one example a child who is dependent on the parent for everything cannot control the neighborhood they live in or control what they are exposed too.   I know everyone

  So how in the world am I writing this lolol!!! I don't think I have ever had one. Sad but true.  In a world of dysfunction and coping mechanisms it's so hard to actually find it.  Or is it hard? I can't lie let's just be frank we all meet the guy or the girl that is the sweetest person and they totally feel perfect.  Of course, we know perfect does not exist no matter how hard we look.  I think the solution to that is realizing what your perfect is and is there any growth happening in the relationship.  Trust this if you are not growing all the time in some way and learning new things you will never feel perfect.  Healthy doesn't mean perfect and in no way am I saying perfect should be you expecting bare minimum bullshit from anyone.   Healthy relationships have to be laughing together, watching the movie together and cooking together but healthy relationships are also doing a lot of things apart.  I never quite realized this until I got much older.  I have notice

  Well, well, well here we go!!!! I can literally hear everyone screaming its DEAD 😵 Too many women I know struggle and even men are struggling with the idea of romance. Maybe the problem is that we see it as just an idea and not something we truly want to implement into our relationships. Love is a VERB. I can’t remember the last time I was getting into a car and the man held the door open for me but to be completely honest I feel like that may have happened three weeks ago when I was hopping into my Lyft with this guy who likes to play my boyfriend on occasion, and it felt awkward. I am pretty sure it felt awkward because no one ever does it. When I think of romance, I think about the movies I have watched over and over again that show guys that are hopelessly in love and go to hell and back to make sure the girl realizes how much he wants to be with her.  Flash into reality really quick the IG DM ugh or tinder not my particular thing but a lot of people are Tinder, Bumble and Hinge

 It’s funny the twists and turns of this thing called life.  I feel like we are all just here winging it and even when someone gives us a blueprint or sets it up for us it's still never easy.  I mainly think it's not easy because of all of things like the conditioning and the brainwashing that comes from society.   Life is so fleeting and to think we worry almost our entire lives about love and money and some of us just worry about the basics or bare minimums a place to lay their head at night.  You know when I lived out of my car for a week one time, I never realized how much I took taking a shower for granted.   I called this blog The Imitation of Life because it was the name of a movie my mother introduced to me! It’s about a mixed girl who could pass completely for white, but her father had disowned her, so she only had her black mother who looked after her. She hated her mother for being black but at the end of the movie when her mother dies, she had a complete meltdown on